My mother is Mariana Oduber a woman who always stood firm in her identity. She calls herself “De Hele Echte”(The Real One), and growing up, my sister and I always knew exactly who we were, with pride and confidence in ourselves. In a time when emotional independence wasn’t yet mainstream, my mom raised us with a mindset that was different: without limits, without doubt, and with abundant love. We grew into strong women, crowned queens of our own paths, each with a master’s degree and fierce independence.
Mariana Oduber
Mariana Oduber
Her teachings became even more powerful last October, when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Her mental strength and positivity shaped how I approached the process — without fear, without doubt. And now, as I raise my own son, I realize more deeply how her motherhood shaped the woman I am. She is my mother. She is my foundation of strength.
Mariana Oduber
Mariana Oduber
Below is a dialogue between two generations of power: a mother and daughter. Two women, two visions one unbreakable bond.
Gilliany to Mariana: Mami, when you became a mother for the first time, what were your expectations?
Mariana: “I always had it in my mind that both of my daughters would be successful. My wish was for them to have a good education, to become professionals with stable careers, and to be independent standing confidently on their own feet. And today, I can say: I succeeded.”
Mariana to Gilliany: We always had a beautiful home life, and I wanted to make sure of that as a mother. How would you describe your upbringing?
Gilliany: "I grew up in a home rich in love and abundant calm, where tradition held great value. Celebrating everything was a rule in our home, and culture was part of our daily life. From carnival, dance, art, and creativity to music with Papi. Honestly, we had it all and more. And of course, humor it always healed our hearts.”
Gilliany to Mariana: How would you describe your parenting style?
Mariana: “I know I was a strong mother. I didn’t want you to stray from your goals. I always wanted to make sure you stayed on the right path. My mother was very strict with me, so I had to find a balance between what I allowed and what I didn’t but I was always deeply involved in both of your lives, to make sure you were doing well.”
Mariana to Gilliany: What is one lesson from my parenting that you want to pass on to your son, Brayden?
Gilliany: “That the most important opinion is your own, and your mind is incredibly powerful. Mami always told us that we define our own success in life and I want Brayden to know that too. He carries that power in his mind, and with it, he can achieve anything in life.”
Gilliany to Mariana: How did you manage to raise us with a limitless mindset long before that was a trend? Where did you learn that?
Mariana: “Confidence is something you pass down, generation to generation. Your grandmother always showed how sure she was of herself and was incredibly proud. As her daughter, I wanted to raise my daughters the same way. Both of you have a legacy to leave in this world, and that seed was planted from the very beginning. I always talked a lot with you and Gossy. I’ll never stop talking, I’ll always be your mother, no matter how old you are.”
Mariana to Gilliany: Now that you're raising a son with the same energy I gave you, how does it feel to pass that tenderness on to Brayden as a young boy in today’s world?
Gilliany: “Identity is shaped at home. Give your child a sense of place and make sure you guide that identity before the world tries to define it for them. For Brayden, both his parents are making sure he gets the tools he needs to thrive in life.”
Gilliany to Mariana: Mami, you’ve always called yourself “de hele echte” why?
Mariana: “Yes, from a young age, I’ve always told everyone I’m ‘de hele echte.’ I mean ‘the real queen.’ I’m proud of myself and even prouder now that I’ve raised two daughters. My daughters couldn’t have been anyone else! Now I make space to pass the crown on to them. It was never about being the one in charge it’s about preparing my daughters to wear their own crown.”
Mariana to Gilliany: Now that you’re facing one of the hardest moments in life, what is something you want Brayden to always remember?
Gilliany: “I don’t want him to feel like he has to shrink himself to feel comfortable, no matter the circumstances and definitely not because of cancer. Growth happens when you're uncomfortable. I remind myself that I don’t need permission to shine and show up for myself, even now when I physically look so different.”
Gilliany to Mariana: When I told you about my diagnosis, how did you take it as my mother?
Mariana: “Positivity is a choice. The moment I sensed your result would be negative, I immediately planted it in my mind that once confirmed, we’d shift our mindset and move forward. My daughter is going to come out of this stronger. You’ve always been a positive child, sure of yourself and mentally grounded. I never doubted you, Gill.”
Mariana to Gilliany: And how did you feel telling me and your son about the diagnosis?
Gilliany: “To be honest, the hardest part of the whole process was telling you. Telling someone who loves you deeply that you’re sick — that’s hard. But you didn’t let my mind wander into dark places. You told me I’d shine brighter than ever, and reminded me this is just something to overcome.”
“Telling Brayden was a little more complicated for him to understand, but it was an honest, direct conversation so he could prepare for the physical changes. I also reminded him that the mind, heart, and our love remain the same.”
Gilliany to Mariana: What was a moment during this journey that made you feel proud of me?
Mariana: “It’s not just one moment it’s constant. I see your strength every day, Gill. And your strength is what helps us, your parents, stay strong too.”
Mariana to Gilliany: What’s been the hardest part of this journey for you so far?
Gilliany: “You know I’ve always been independent. I led teams, stood as president of an organization, and raised a beautiful son but this is a terrain I don’t know. I had to learn a new kind of strength. Letting people support you is part of healing too.”
Gilliany to Mariana: How do you stay positive during moments that feel unfair or hard?
Mariana: “I never allow my mind to drift away from the bigger plan. I stay focused. Life is short we have to make sure we live it fully. Find joy. Keep your mind and life beautiful, and stay focused on your purpose.”
Mariana to Gilliany: What’s something about me as your mother that you want to make sure your child learns too?
Gilliany: "To celebrate your children for exactly who they are. Let them be. I was always celebrated chubby belly and all, just like my sister. I want Brayden to experience that too. Celebrate loudly when he gets it right, and gently help him grow where he needs to.”
Gilliany to Mariana: How has your role as a mother changed now that you’re also a grandmother to Brayden and Vincent?
Mariana: “Being a grandmother is extraordinary. I want the best for my grandsons. I’m proud of them. I pray for health to be with them for a long time to help guide them, teach them discipline, character, respect, and love. And just because they’re boys doesn’t mean they don’t need guidance. With the same dedication I gave as a mother, I now give as a grandmother.”
Together: For anyone reading our conversation, what is it that we want them to know?
Mariana: “I raised strong women who stand in their power but also women who know when to ask for help. We are not alone in this world. I call myself ‘de hele echte’ not for praise, but to speak powerfully about myself to move forward, and to pass that light to my daughters.”
Gilliany: “Mami, you didn’t just raise queens you raised pillars of women who can face anything. I’m walking the road of healing, and I carry your words, your smile, your care, your love, and your legacy with me.”
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